“It is fateful and ironic how the lie we need in order to live dooms us to a life that is never really ours.”

-Ernest Becker

Tolerating reality is perhaps the greatest challenge of life.

Many people who seek therapy are looking for relief from a painful reality. Life can be intensely difficult at times and painful experiences are a part of the human experience. In response to this pain, we often construct a way of filtering life in order to make it more livable. While these attempts to protect ourselves are necessary and adaptive, they may fail us or lead us down a stray path. We may find that our attempts at dealing with suffering no longer work. We may feel lost and realize we have become strangers to ourselves or to those around us.

Therapy can be a process of reclaiming lost aspects of ourselves and discovering parts that perhaps were hidden or never known. This reclamation process can take time and feel disorienting but it can be richly rewarding. It is the work of becoming more honest with ourselves and, ultimately, of inhabiting a fuller self with more capacity to engage in reality and live a life that is our own.